Every hunter knows the name Jim Shockey. He is a man’s man probably the toughest, manliest hunter on the planet. He hunts the most rugged and rough country there is and has hunted places no has ever dreamed of hunting. We already regarded him as legend of masculinity, but we did not know how big the legend actually was.
Rumors began to circulate in hunting circles, after Jim did an interview with Cameron Hanes. Hanes stated that, “He could not hold Jim Shockey’s jock Strap.” At first we thought he was just speaking figuratively. It turns out he was speaking literally.
In an exclusive interview an employee of Under Armour, who spoke on a condition of anonymity, confirmed that Under Armour provides Mr. Shockey with custom underware to support his quote “Testicular Fortitude.” Come to find out this is the main reason Jim decided to sign a sponsorship deal with them.
Our source told us that the design was not easy. The fabric they usually use did not have the tensile strength to contain him. They had to come up with a new fabric that incorporated Kevlar and steal cable. He was ecstatic the first time he tried them on.
He was overheard saying, “This sure beats my old system of bungee cords and an old army parachute. It will sure be nice to be able to walk up a mountain without tripping over myself, if you know what I mean.”
Like we said we always new Jim Shockey was a man; we just did not know how much of a man he really was.
HAPPY APRIL FOOL’S